This is my story about trying to make a baby. If bodies or infertility or words like sperm make you uncomfortable or bum you out, then you can skip this one.
IUI #2 started really well, and then things kind of went downhill. My first round of Letrozole cost about $155. No joke. 10 pills, $155. Yikes. When things didn’t work out, I told my friend “I’m having the most expensive period of my life right now!” Right now, I’m having the second most expensive period of my life. Super lame. BUT, with a new prescription plan that went into effect January 1, my Letrozole cost $8.08 the second time. I was pretty pleased with this, and convinced that it was a sign that everything was supposed to work out. My medicine was significant cheaper! My follicles were ready at the first ultrasound! The day of the insemination was a rainy, yucky, slow-day-at-work Monday and I didn’t miss anything super important! IUI#2 was the magic one for some friends! The only downside was that Dr. Robb was off to his new job in Canada and I had a different doctor for the ultrasound and actual insem (yup, I just abbreviated the word insemination. Deal with it). When they called my name and put us in an office instead of a procedure room, I didn’t think anything of it. They’re probably waiting for someone to finish and then they’ll move me to a room. They just didn’t want me waiting out there for too long. Then the doctor came in. Then the resident came in. And then she closed the door. The alarms still weren’t ringing. And then the doc dropped a bombshell: Daniel’s sperm counts were low. Like half of what they should be. Still not a big deal to me - whatever, we’d just wait a few days and come back to try again. The egg(s) would still be okay, right? I asked the doctor what day would be good to come back. She and the resident exchanged an awkward glance and I knew we were in trouble. She said if we didn’t do it now, it wouldn’t happen this cycle. Then I wanted to throw up. I wanted to cry. I wanted to run away. I looked at Daniel and he shrugged (thanks hon) and I panicked. I had just paid for this whole thing 10 minutes earlier. If we didn’t do it, we’d lose money. We knew our chances would be lower, but they were greater than 0% and that was better than nothing. We said we’d move ahead with the procedure. I don’t think the doctor thought we’d go through with it, they put me in a room and then came back 20 minutes later. Bad idea! I just sat there and was freaking out and trying to talk to Daniel, but he was too busy looking up articles about the importance of sperm count in regards to IUI on his phone so I was mostly just rambling. The doctor and resident finally came in and they all crowded around me (Daniel included) and went to work. The first time, Dr. Robb had to do some fancy maneuvering to get everything where it needed to be, so I spotted and cramped and felt yucky for the rest of the day. This time was a walk in the park, I didn’t hurt or spot or anything, so that was really nice. I bummed around the rest of the day and went back and forth between thinking Why did I let myself go through with this?! and I’m glad I did it while watching Netflix and napping.
From the beginning, I told myself I wasn’t going to test until the weekend after the 14 days had passed. I’m working on a lot of projects at work and I didn’t want to get distracted during the week with a positive or negative test. Unfortunately, I didn’t have to wait that long because good ol’ Aunt Flo made an appearance 15 days post-insem. I’m much more okay with this one than I was the first time, I knew that this chance was much smaller and I had mentally prepared for it. I ate half a box of chocolate chip cookies though, and that helped me feel better too.
Daniel’s spring break is coming up in a couple of weeks and we’re planning on taking a day to go to Chicago to meet with LDS Family Services about adoption. I have a couple of girls in the ward who have some know-how about the adoption process, so I will definitely be going to them for more info. The last few times I worked at the temple I’ve been in the Youth Center with little ones being sealed to their parents, so I feel like it’s a sign that it’s something to pursue (which is good because I’m one of those people who needs to be smacked upside the head to “get it”). I put Baby Lindsay and Our Caseworker on the temple prayer roll on Saturday, and IUI #3 starts tomorrow, so hopefully we’ll get a baby one way or another soon.
Please continue to pray for us and think happy thoughts!